New Year 2012....

Today is the first day in a new year.Yes,that's right.Is already 2012 and I am still stay with my books for revision.But today my friend,Jian Hua already invited me to study calculus together.I slept at 3am yesterday not for count down,but staying alone in my hostel room study and fb+ing and i woke up at 11.00am today.I saw my friend's message that she will send her phone on 9.30am today and she told me there will be no contact for few weeks.I was about to send a message to her but i saw the time had past so i did not manage to send her any message.But strange thing was i sent a few message to her but she did not reply me any message and yet she sent me message.

My new year,i did not do anything special,although my friends did ask me out for countdown,but yesterday i really don't have any mood to countdown at all.Just think that is just 2012 and for me 2012 is just another year as others year too.So i just stayed up to revise and do one set question that provided from my friend also.It takes me three hours to find out all the six question's answer.Although is tired,i still manage to find it out.

Oh yea,New Year Resolutions:
1)Change of my new image in the sense of having a different view of me from others.
2)I hope in this coming few years,i will able to achieve in what i had set for my future.
3)Set a target for my sister for her SPM.
4)Keep on dancing and learned new kind of dances.
5)Know more people and associates with them well.
6)Last thing,i hope my journey will start with a fabulous experience where i can do something i never did before in previous year.Anything will do.

That's all for my new year hope.

Experience

Today,i'm so eager to study and i told myself that i must wake up early today to study although yesterday i had slept late.And i woke up at 10.00am,quickly had a bath and carried my stuff go up to SANGGAR 12 where it is a nice place to study.I had study from 11.00am until afternoon 2.30pm and i just done one sheet of example question plus a bit revision on the equation.When the time reached till 3.00pm,i felt so stressed up because many things still dunno and yet the days are coming.After that,i decide to facebook a while and saw one of my friend just keep like other people status but din online.Then suddenly she come and PM me,she said she caught me in facebook but in fact i just online.Then she told me she was in the saloon perming her hair.So looking forward for her new image.

Then i told her something else,she was like very normal,haha...she seems very cool and chill....haha...Then she din replied me after that and i guessed she was cutting her hair.Then i saw another friend,Mis E was online.I chatted with her a while and we had chatted a lot of thing.We shared a lot of experiences and i very grateful she is willing to share with me and her advice to me.And all i can do is wish "her" good luck.My friend,Mis E she said she is very eager to see everyone changes,especially some friends where she did not keep in touch quite long.

At the same time,i also give her some advice and she also willing to listen,although i don't have that standard to give other people advice because i was a failure in certain aspect.Thank you and be patient,that's all i can advice to you,Mis E.

Haih,long time din chat with old friend and today have the chance to do so,it makes me feel good and not so stress.But sad thing is the date of final is coming,i still feel very tense up coz of the surrounding.Luckily i have my KPOP songs accompany me....HEHE!!!!

Random

Back to UPM since yesterday,alone carrying 4 packs of stuff walking from hentian serdang to K10 bus stop,a bit tiring but trained myself to carry such load.Since yesterday till today,i dun have any mood to start my revision.At first yes,i very eager to start it,but when slowly by slowly when i do some exercise and i just realized a lot of things i don't know,i started to give up.Until two times i had studied till fall asleep on my study table,this is the first time i had such experience in my life and is not a good experience.

Today studied a bit chemistry,and when i read the form six notes i brought,suddenly thought of a lot memories in FORM SIX life.I remembered my friends and teachers.So missed them and looking forward to meet them again in coming Chinese New Year.

Just now have a chat with my friend,and i just found out she will not coming for the dance camp.Well,she has her own reason not to come and i'm sure there is.Anyway,nice chat with her and bring up my mood a bit,so i continue study after that.Until now,i think i still need  a lot of revision.

Hopefully,my test will pass with my own effort...hehe

Christmas holiday

I just had a three-days holiday in KL,where i stayed at my cousin's house for the first time.I had done lot of shopping stuffs in KL where i went to Times Square,S.Wang,Pavilion,1 Utama and finally Mid Valley.The results were fascinating coz i got myself to buy a few clothes.But this was not the important thing i got from the holiday.

What i get from this holiday was very precious for me and is important for me to do any further decision on my future.My family and my cousin's family were chit-chatting about my future and my cousin's family members' performance.I was staying at my second uncle's son's house.This is the family i most admire of coz of their performance.Three kids,first one is LOGITECH manager,second is a girl and a doctor and the last one is a financial marketer.The first one just got himself a daughter and he is very happy.The doctor,already engaged since few months and will get married after she get her final paper as approved doctor.Her fiancee is a chemist,just like me.Both of them are my inspiration to my future.

One thing i admire and inspired the most from the doctor is she is so consistent in her studies and relationship eventhough she was studying in SABAH last time.And what i get from the talk is not everything goes smoothly as we want.For sure there will be crest and through all the way,it depends on how you manipulate the way u gonna pass through all those crest and through.And that is my challenge for me right now and my future.One more thing my uncle told me is that I must confirm really what i know in my future and manage my future relationship well,not only in family but with corporate also.He mentioned that the main inspiration is come from parents ad support from parents also.

I felt very grateful and thankful because i have the best parents i ever thought.Thanks to them,i just manage to get into primary school,secondary school and now UNIVERSITY....I know when the time when my father was comfort me during the choice of between doctor and engineer,he was sad coz i din get to choose to become doctor,sorry to tell him coz is really not my interest although the future is bright.And when the time i get the current course but not engineer,i was a bit sad but luckily i have my parents to explain to me what is the pros and cons of getting this course,and of course the best part was,i get to know a lot of friends in my kolej coz i get this course.....

I must learn to manage something that beyond my limit.Although i had fall down once,but i'm not gonna let it to become my reason to stop right now.Hopefully that tine u can become more mature in thinking and action.

Friends

Yesterday was one of my happy day ever.Because i ate tang yuan again made by my roommate's friends themselves.Thanks to them i felt the happiness and warmness among them.Another thing was yesterday i just watched the movie "You Are The Apple Of My Eyes".Indeed,it was a touching movie when towards the end.But in this movie,the scripts that they used in this movie keeps on reminding me on what i had told her before.Is just like what the movie had copied what i had said before.And the strange thing was the scenes inside this movie is almost the same as me and her had before.

I believe she is my “沈佳宜” ,but the scenes in my world here is different from the movie.Right now,i just want to ensure that she can get good results in her final especially her physics.She was so worried on her pertanian until she don't have much time to revise on the physics properly.I tried my best to help her as i could,hope my teaching can benefit her at least a bit and lessen her burden on revising the other topics on the physics.A few days ago we had a small chat while i was teaching her physics.At least i knew that she had the feeling also,but what she said were right.We both must study hard first because the basic is our future.Cannot just waste the basic and destroy our future.All i will do is wait for her patiently and help her in her studies if she need my help as far as i could。

Thanks to her,she let me feel back the friend's warmness and the use of a friend when i need a friend.She will always be there to wish,motivate or even smile on me.I really appreciate her kindness and careness.Good luck to her final exams and wish her will have a good grade.

JUST GO FOR IT!!!!!

Final exam

Look on my final exam schedule:

Organic Chemistry:04/01

TiTas:05/01

Physical + Inorganic:09/01

Calculus:10/01

Biology:14/01

Although my schedule will not that pack,

But the arrangement is not nice

Have to rush my holiday with certain revision

Plus the first two tests are my "killing" subject...

MEMORIZING....

OH MY GOSH!!!

luckily i have plan my timetable...

and i think i can handle it....

hehe...

Sadness bring failure~~~Breathe and Glow...

I had another worst day in my world,that is yesterday.Nobody will understand how sad was I yesterday and how down was I when i was alone in my hostel room.BUT what can I do??Nothing....I was thinking just use a knife to stab into my heart or just jump from fifth floor.

Luckily,there's some friend who willing to hear from me,and i really appreciate,really....Thank you for you all.I have one friend,who are so willing enough until I haven manage to ask her to listen to my problem and she already mentioned that she willing to hear from me,really touched I have this kind of friend.But still wanna thanks to one of my friends,she really understand my situation and my mood cheer up a bit after listen to her advice and some motivation.Yes,I need some time to overcome my feeling.No one will ever know my feeling when your friends don't wanna pick up your call and don't wanna reply your sms.Maybe i deserve in such ways??I don't know.All i know right now is I need to set a timeline for me,after this timeline,is really over for ME!Yes,IS OVER.

Anyway,yesterday talk to my mum again,she said she long time did not go out gai gai since i was small last time.She said not convenient to bring me out coz i always very annoyed.Sorry for my innocent and my naughty mummy,cause you and daddy don't have two people world time after had me.But i will go for christmas celebration this sunday by coming to my cousin's house in KL...Yeah,can buy my new year clothes,shoes.If can,next year i want to change one new spec,i want to change myself in order to prove myself  that i don't need "them" i still can be friends with others.At least my old school friends like Mr.Alien,Mr.Michael Jordan,Mis Fatty and Nerd these three are the person who i remember the most in my form 6 time,and some others still very concern of me,but for those,sorry if i have to ignore you.

Last week before final,few reports and revision need to be done soon,but i already in NEW YEAR mood...haha....

心情

心里下着的那一场大雨，

有谁会明白？？

我很辛苦，

或许这是你对我的惩罚。。

我想我应该做的东西，

就是放开一切。

但是我不想。

因为我就是不想。

我好想躲在床里，

好好的大哭一场。

因为我不够坚强。

我的苦衷，

有谁会明白？？

每个人都叫我不要在缠着她，

但。。。

算了吧，

我怎样做现在都是给人家烦感。

就学着保持沉默。

Good

Today i feel great no matter how i acted,i just can't found a reason for me to become sad.But i realized i worried someone when i was in the dancing class.I just don't know why and it just happen in such way.Until today she ask me whether i got worried about her safety.Of course i had if not i won't have such worries yesterday.But i was thinking she asking me something else,luckily i just realized after she mentioned it.

I think we are quite comfortable in such way when we meet.Not so frequently and just through messages.I asked her one question twice but both time also no reply.I guess she don't want to answer this question.At least i know now that is no more so called "harm" are existing anymore.I just want to have a normal way to meet her,chat with her and of course in future,maybe can just have the normal way to have relationship,who knows??But i don't expect much because i don't want to have another same mistake like last time.

I just afraid to anything further than this right now.I just keep my way from her as long no more harm and she is happy with that way.Yesterday,my dancing class monitor ask me how was me and she?i just answer her,nothing happen to both of us.By the way,at that time i just think of when i saw she is happy like last time during celebration.

Anyway,i feel happy today when i chat with my mum again.My mum tease me somemore,but i feel comfortable when i heard her laughter.I also went to the book fair to choose one book for my sister as christmas present but unfortunately nothing is bought because is not suitable at all.

I want to be more happy than yesterday.Jia you!!!!

Evolution

Is almost 2am from what i can see from my table clock,but i just can't sleep today.When i turn on my korean song playlist,i just choose on BIGBANG song,"tell me goodbye".This song is sang in Japanese version,i just keep repeating the song,then i just realized i already EMO+ing,because this is a love song.This song was mentioning that the narrator love a girl but the girl left the narrator without saying goodbye.The narrator just expressing the feeling of losing the girl.I just can't stop myself from playing this song.

This was reminded by one of my friend's status.And what i was reminded is the conversation between me and her.My friend was right,let the bygones be bygones,because there is nothing i can do right now.It is impossible for me to go back like those days.So my blog will always be the best place for me to say anything i like.I suddenly realized that actually i had a lot of new friends and friends who are still remember me and always be there for me when i need them.Thank you for the concern from each one of you these days,especially one of my friend in Melaka,who study in UUM right now,she is really my BBF and i won't forget her no matter how.

Memories are used for the reflash,but never let yourself to stay in the past memories.I must evolve from the past in order to change myself,that is the only way i can do to prove myself i already become mature,not only just study but also developing my social life.Right now,i have bunch of new friends who are understanding me,concern me and always be there for me no matter what.Plus I have my own lifestyle to study and go for activities,especially just develop my new interest,DANCING!!!

About "her' and me,i think the way i socialize with her now is better than last time,at least a bit better.Right now i just know something call freedom or space to view the aspect of socializing.I remind myself do not expect too much from her and just be normal although many people are saying something which is not real at all.Only she and me know the truth,so just let it be until the day has come.

I must be happy so that i won't let myself just drop into some place i never recognize myself anymore.

relationship

Today i had a enough sleep until 1pm just now because is really a tired nap for me.I don't know what kind of feeling i should have right now.I really confused right now.Confused not because i'm not sure on what i want to have,is confused on what feeling should i have to face the reality.I need someone who can console my sorrowness,my loneliness and my sadness.I can't just put it down like this although i had said so in previous post.I really can't.

Facing her,i don't know should be just friends or just another special relationship with her.Because i know what i want,so i don't want to make any mistakes.Sometimes,feeling this kind of thing is always playing with us.When you don't want to think about it anymore,suddenly there's a miracle happen again in front of you.

Currently,what i had done now,i think is quite ok for her and me also.Plus,i can see that somebody is more popular than me among the choices,so i guess right now i'm not a problem anymore to her and this is a relieve for me.Hope that the pace now will keep maintain.I found out that she is keep thinking my feeling just temporary,i wonder why she will keep thinking like that.Maybe because she didn't want this kind of thing happen at all,or she just can't accept the fact that she has the feeling also?i don't know at all,all i know is i should keep a distance with her for now for not harming her at all.That is the most important.About the feeling,i just keep inside my heart first so that she happy and i am happy also.

One day in Mid Valley

Thanks to friends who willing to accompany me come out to have fun although tomorrow still have the mega project to busy with/I have a lot of fun today and already ate+done many food and activities.I ate korean food,snowflakes,go for movie,go for bowling and many more.My friend also taught me how to have a meal like those korean they have their meal.Overall,today was a good day for me and i really appreciate my friend's help and guide to Mid Valley.Here are some pic,just enjoy:

 taking photo with the special decoration in Mid Valley

 that's me

 me and my friend.thanks to her

 korean food.I like it very much

 rice cake(korean)..strongly recommend

 korean style sotong

 guess wat is this??

 My high tea(big apple donuts)

Is my snowflakes.(is soya bean series)nice nice..first time eat...

This is my dinner....nice nice

Very fun and tired.I hope next time "she" will come with me also...SO that next time i will also have fun again with"her".....

regret??

Yesterday have another chat topic with her.I told her as long she did not regret then is OK for me.She mentioned that i am really important.Then i told her something that made her to think something else.She said she wanted to do in years which made me cannot think of what is that about.Anyway,i wasn't forcing her to do anything,as long she is happy and she din regret,that is fine for me.

I just wanted to see her happy always....really wanted her to happy..........

Fading

Today,i just had my biology test.First time i felt so happy after i took my biology test because although i studied till 3 am last night and i still manage to answer all of the question.My effort was worth for it.

Just read her blog today,feel a bit regret and cannot face the other side of me because need to give up the feeling and hide it in the other part of me.I hope she will get better and happier after all my effort to get the situation right again.Of course i will always be her friend,but she also knows that i not only wanted to be just friends.However,i cannot do anything right now coz i feel that the more i done,the more harm and hurt i will cause to her,so i have to hide the feeling in sorrow.Yesterday i just found out that actually the like i have towards her is not temporarily,but all of this doesn't matter anymore,coz no matter how much i have the like on her,she won't notice also coz she just don't want to face her feeling at the same time.

So,i just take this as another short like feeling memory although is not short actually.Now as long she happy then i will be happy,that is more important.Hope she know what she is doing right now.

Everything had comes to the end

These two days,i wonder why she acted very strangely.After i read something,i just noticed she already a distance away from me.Maybe she is right,i'm just having a temporary like to her.From the beginning of the day when i enter UPM,i found out that she is a special friend for me,a friend that can have a lot of topic to mentioned.But i just realized that i can't further expand the relationship with her now,because it is quite impossible for me to do so.I don't dare to think of future relationship because now i knew that think too much will cause a lot of trouble and unneccessary rumours that might hurt everybody.So in order to not let this thing worsen,maybe she is right on keeping a distance a way from me.Therefore,i think i should prepare to keep my good feeling towards her in my other part of my soul and concentrate on my study.

Maybe my mum was right,i already destined to have my life partner after i worked.I shouldn't let go anything before this,but since decision already made,i don't want my past to become a dark shadow and haunting me everyday.And for future,i think i should keep my distance and my words to her away.Because it seems that rumours had affected her a lot.Moreover,final exams are around the corner,I guess she and me also want to concentrate on this exam.So i think i don't want to think too much on that matter anymore,just go ahead to do what i want to do in UPM.I want to join many activities as i could if i have the good sense of time management.

My first dream is to travel to KOREA,because i love korea culture very much.Therefore,i want to get my core subjects of my course in best way in order for me to learn the KOREA language in third year without any worries.Hopefully my first dream will come true.....

Worth day

Today,it was one of my most memorable day.Although today i am physically tired,but i never regret for doing this.Actually,tomorrow will be her birthday,but i had celebrate with her early.Today,i had my koku session at 12p.m.I ended my session on 3pm and then suddenly i got a call from her.She said she want to go back hostel to  take something before went for the audition.In my heart i was like OK,coz since i also want to go back to take something,i just go back take something and accompany her to went to the audition place.After i get back,i just quickly had a bath and changed my attire.When she saw me,she said i'm look different than other time and she also want to change her attire too.I told her she already perfect with that attire but in the end,she still change it.Then we just go to the audition place and i just waited her at outside.

After that,we just went for the PLAN that she had suggested yesterday,that is go to THE MINES to get a new spectacles for her.I just followed her to the place.But then i already planned to celebrate her birthday today at that place.And she knew it too,so when arrived at there,i just went to search for the cake shop.We had chose a banana chocolate and went for PIZZAS.We ate two regular pizzas but not managed to finish it,so we just packed them up to bring back.Then it was celebration time and we just celebrate.I took some photos and she is very happy.She keep said thank you to me and i also very "paiseh",dunno why.After that we just go for the spec shop.She chose a new type of her new spec but i think every spec is also match to her coz face is pretty,every spec will be match to her pretty.After finish getting a spec,we just took a walk around THE MINES before it stopped operating.After that we just took the cab back to UPM.

So overall,i am very happy for her and she is also happy.Is worth for me to do this.Just now when i called her back,she said thank you again to me but i told her she is welcome.Haha.....But one thing i not quite comfortable is what other people think of me on the way i socialised with her.And yes,it seems that i'm quite troublesome and not really giving her any space to do her stuff.I should give her some space to do something else,not just meeting her and troublesome her.Because i don't want to burden her anything.I dun need other people to judge the way i socialize with other people,i only care what she think of my way to socialize.Even though other people dun want me to succeed,i also feel never mind,coz even i din succeed,at least i still have her as my friend.So is not a big deal of succeed or not.I just want to see she is happy always and not putting the sad face in her expression.So i told her what is my wish in the call for her 20th birthday.Hope she will remember.

Ok lar,is time to sleep.Bye...

random

Today,i just got back my calculus test 2 paper.I thought this time my calculus paper will be a disaster because i did not really have a look on the theory part.Luckily i had a good MATH tutor in FORM SIX and his notes help me a lot in my calculus paper,so i still remember what should be done in the calculus question.Thanks to him and my calculus test 2 is safe and i quite satisfied by the result.But what make me feel sad is last test i study a lot but i did not get the marks i wanted,strange thing is i did not study this time can get higher marks than test 1.When he announced that our performance is poor,i already knew the day will come but luckily i still manage to survive.....haha...

Yesterday,i had dance practise.RX had teach us some new steps and i learned it quickly.I feel very happy in every dance practise because i can learn new dance steps.Somemore the dance camp is near too...I am looking forward to the dance camp in February next year coz my dancing class monitor said the dance we are going to learn in the dance camp will be the dance in next year dance concert.Once i heard it,i become more happy coz finally can perform for next year dance concert.I will learn it by all my heart till flawless.

Tomorrow,she will go for the lawatan to the orang asli place.Either go to Klang or Ampang,she told me depends on situation.She ask me whether i want to come along at first,but she seems like want to retreat what she had spoken.Anyway,if she allow me to go,of course i will go coz all of of her group members are girl,so is better there is a boy following for the lawatan.

Smile always...hehe

Innocent

Today was a normal day.I had my physical chemistry practical class and calculus tutorial class.But sad thing is my calculus lecturer mention that the calculus test 2 was a disaster and he so kind till add on one more question to pull our marks up.

Anyway,I feel on wanna express something else.Again,i feel that nowadays i'm become more lazy.Lazy to wake up,lazy to exercise and lazy to move.I couldn't find the reasons though,not even one.Or just maybe is because too much stress come from the new life.But one thing i will never become lazy after i enter UNI,that is DANCING.....when i am dancing,i just dance without any worries,not anymore because i'm actually a person who are quite shy.But until i met one of my dancing senior,she told me talents should be shared so to let other people know what u can do,this speech has make my interest to dance spikes up.Dancing really make me feel happy coz once i dance,all of the stress are gone.I won't ever quit dancing,and i want to dance until the moment i couldn't dance.

Another thing i want to write is about her(Miss C).Everybody is very curious about my current status especially my old Melaka friends,but sorry for disapponting u guys,i still single.Although i know that kind of feeling is very incredible,and it makes a person to change,however,i still think i am not mature enough to handle this matter back yet.I dun wish to hurt anybody especially her.She is a very innocent girl,and that's make her to do everything with an innocent heart.When she is serious in her studies,her expression was the most beautiful expression.So i will keep watching her from time to time so that whenever she need my help,i will able to help her.From this way,i can get close to her so that she will afraid me less.

Starting this moment,i will always be her guardian angel until forever even in future we may not be couple coz i just wanted to do so.i like her smile and everytime i look on her smile,i will never my mood down.Hopefully she can always smile and never sad.

waiting for you

I went back to my UNI just now by riding the 8am bus.The bus can have 40 people for each ride,but guess how many people were on the bus??only seven people included the driver were on the bus.So i reached UPM is about 10.10am.I walked into the K10 bus stop with my friend and had the kolej bus to went back to our hostel.

Once i reached my hostel,i quickly put down my stuff and finish my assignment.So unlucky that day before i went back to Melaka,i had a presentation at DKS and at that time i think my pendrive was infected by virus.And all my files inside have to be deleted.So my soft copy for my TITAS assignment was gone and i have to retype all over again.So that's why i din even tidy my stuff yet then quickly done my assignment.Finally finished at 2pm and read my biology a while.I managed to read till two chapters but still have 3 more chapters need to read.I will not give up coz i already promised somebody to work hard.^^

Until now,Miss C just managed to chat me few words in facebook.So i din noe how was her day today.Wish can have her news immediately coz i wanna know.

New motivation

Haha,back to blogging time.Today was not a good day for me.Ever since yesterday Miss C did not reply my message,my mood was just down.But until just now,she finally replied me.And we had a chat.Not a long chat but just a nice chat.Different kind of mood after had a chat with her.

I just feel there's a different feel when i meet and talk to her.It just like want to get near to her and tell her many things,as long as having a chat.I dunno which post did she saw until she said something strange to me.And since i had promised her that we will maintain as what we are first,i will have this promise as long as i could.I don't want her to think that i am a person who break a promise easily,although i did last time.That's why nowadays i am very careful with my promise,do not simply promise people when u cannot do it,trust me,it will ruin everything.

So from now on,she will be my motivation to do my part to the best.I want to prove to her that i can do it with my own ability,and i want her to admit herself to me on that day.Plus,i'm looking forward to a date,because i'm sure that day will be a different memory to her on that specific date.Hopefully she won't get shock on what will happen on that day coz i dun want her to get any shock.Although i dunno whether she gt any real feeling on me or not,I just want to let her know that no matter what,i won't give up anything on what i had done and what i'm going to do.

Please spice my day up

Today is not a good day for me.The biology test is around the corner but still don't have any mood to study anything.Plus the chapters to be tested in the test 2 is almost 4 chapters and i just read 2 of them.What should i do??

I need some motivation from someone(Miss C),coz only she can cheer my day up.But sad thing is yesterday she told me that her phone is running out of battery and so unfortunately she did not bring her charger back home.Moreover she told me that her phone will be sent to the factory for repairing due to the malfunction of her phone's bluetooth and that's the thing make me sad.Coz this will stop us from sms+ing for a while.Until now she haven reply my yesterday messages.I wonder what she is doing and how was her day today....

I may think that maybe after she looked my today's post she also will wonder why I need her motivation and why she is the only one who can cheer my day.The reason is because her smile is the reason why i will smile too....And her speech is very tantalizing when i listened to each of them.it will spice my mood up whatever topic she is mentioning.Even though is not related to studies,i still like to listen to them.

I wanted to tell her about the dance camp on coming February time,i wanted to tell her that I want to invite her to go,I even wanted to tell her that I want her to go,BUT i couldn't contact her and that's make me feel very down today.Hope she is doing fine at home.

I feel

Haha,back to blogging time.Is almost 2am in the morning but i found myself still hard to sleep coz just back from supper.Anyway,i will start to getting back my old style of writing blog coz one of my friends commented that my blog is too little in words,somemore i will try to put in more on my feeling.

Today,or rather i should say yesterday was my second aunt's family last day of holiday in Malaysia.I was very happy as they seldom back to my hometown and visit us.We had dinner together on last Friday and ate quite a lot of food.But sad thing was i did not manage to have a walk with them around Melaka...><"...But still i felt happy coz can see them in person after so long did not meet them.And they said goodbye at 2pm just now after their private transport arrived and sent them back to Sinagpore.

Well,let's talk about today's routine.As usual,i am a lazy bum and i woke up at 10 something.Then i drive my sister to nearby foodcourt to meet my family for breakfast,guess what i had for my breakfast??is "Bak Kut Teh",haha....really taste good and full too....then i just went back with my two little cousin...One of my little cousins was demanding to play my PS2,so i just on for him reluctanly.After the goodbye from my aunt,then i just continue to study my BIOLOGY coz not yet finish revised.After a while,i just can't focus anymore,so i just call Miss C to ask her about her day.We had a chat a while and i felt very happy to chat with her.She told me that she is enjoy fb+ing and she was uploading plus tagging the photo.I was shocked by her photo as i realized the photo of her keeps  become prettier and prettier from time to time.She told me she like starfruit coz some reason.But honestly,i prefer guava...haha...then she told me she will go outing with her family...Then she told me she like dress and accessories very much...I was thinking she should like coz it makes her more elegant and pretty when she applied them,Then we stopped sms quite a while coz she was shopping.And i was like very lonely coz i used to chat with her nowadays but suddenly din chat with her,so feel emotionally lonely.Then i decided to try my luck again and try sms her.Finally she replied me and told me she had bought 3 dresses.I was very happy for her,really.haha...then i go and chose present for her.And i chose a good present for her,hopefully she like it.She told me she is very good in guessing and yes she is.Until so far she never guessed wrongly on my thing.Haha,looks like she quite good in understanding me...haha....Then sad thing came,she told me that her phone is running out of battery and may send to repair for three weeks.At that time,i suddenly feel very sad coz thought of stopping chat with her.Ever since that momemt,i'm very appreciate on smsing her until she did not reply me anymore.So today,overall,i'm still happy coz can chat with her,talk to her and more importantly can understand her bit by bit.She is a cheerful person and i hope she will never stop of being cheerful.

Smile always.This is the opinion that i wish to give to her.Ok ba,time to sleep.Bye.....

Thought of you

Today is the first time i have insomnia since i back from entering UNI.So,i decided to look back on my friend,Miss C old post of her blog.

I know is a bit rude to look back on people old post,but really,this is a way to know more from a person.So,sorry if my behaviour was a bit over.Now i know bit by bit about her.She is a different girl than others .Why i said so??Is because she is never been fake in her real feeling.She never have the fake side of her.And she always expressed her feeling bit by bit in her heart without letting anyone knows it.In result,this make her very adorable and very trusted because of her pure-heart soul that she had inside within her body.I know maybe i a bit over expressing,but is really difficult to find a person with that kind of attitude and truly come from the bottom of my heart.She never try to stop learning,because for her,learning is always a fun process and will always make her excited.For her,she thinks that a true enjoy in her life will just give her different kind of experience.I'm not going to mention her outer beauty bcoz different kind of girls will have different kind of concept of beauty.But more importantly,she know what is her responsibility.She knows what is her role in her family,she knows what is her role at her age and she always know what is her role in her future from time to time.For me,she has a true and special personality that lies between happiness and responsibility.And that is kind of the personality i try to achieve along my life but sad thing i can't.

But,i also found that she has a great fear on her feeling to others.She afraid and i am trying to help her to overcome her frightening.This will take some time to go against the phobia but i promise i will try my best to do it.Hopefully,you may not think that i will be just a troublesome person in future coz this really involve a lot of communication and interaction process.

She was too good for me and maybe i wasn't that good for her in her mind.that's why sometimes i will feel down whenever i cannot help her.I wish i could always be there to solve everything for her as i could.But anyway,i still prefer ONE STEP AT A TIME.haha....that's all for my today feeling.is time to oi oi....

Helpless

Today,

I will have the first presentation in UPM...

This will be my first experience yet nervous for the first time.

Yesterday,

I had a chat with her.

A chat that i will never forget about it.

I dunno why I can accept everything she said

although it was not beneficial to me

BUT 

i just listen quietly and try to give my opinion to her

I guess this is the power of love.

I advice her always use the power of love to overcome every obstacle.

She told me that she was very messy in thinking,

and I hope i can help her as well...

But I just dunno how...

She said we both still need some time

to know each other well

before anything happen

I just dun want to lose her like that

and she always tell me that she is not an object

yes ,is true...

but what she never know is how much important is she for me....

So after yesterday,

I had decided to keep this feeling in my heart for a while first..

after some time just get it back again...

Hopefully that time i won't easily to get confused again....

THE DAY YOU WENT AWAY,IT WAS LIKE A YEAR FOR ME

ALTHOUGH IS JUST A DAY FOR YOU TO BE AWAY.

Random

Today,

I just felt very down....

Nothing can cheer me up,

unless....

YOUR smile!!!

You always be my apple in my heart no matter what...

Hope can meet you right now.....

Just feel very very unsecure without you

Feel very lonely without you

Feel even cannot feel anything without you...

I just wish you are by my side right now.....

Dance Concert

Yesterday,me and my friend (SF) went for dance concert

It was the first time UPM modern dance class organize a

"JUST DANCE"

dance concert.

We were very enjoyed for the events

and this has increase my interest to explore more dance move.

Meanwhile,i was stunned by a few dance steps

which perform by a group of small kids.

The most important thing that

make me feel unbelievable is

one of the member just used up 7 months

to learn a break dance....

It sounds crazy right???

Overall,the events was fabulous and flawless

Thanks to the members and dancers who

put in so much effort in this dance concert

so that to let us have the opportunity 

to discover the amazingness of

MODERN DANCE

And i have a good night with her too!!haha...

Oh No NO!~~~

dun you think of that "kind" of thing...haha

many people already give me some comments about her and me...

but only I and she knows the truth..

SO,JUST LET IT BE AS NORMAL AS WE COULD...haha

Chemist~ Wonderland

CHEMIST WONDERLAND AT RED BOX

looking at the top of the header,you may think what is that meant for...Is my course night for the CHEMISTRY DEPARTMENT and this is the title for the course night.But our course night wasn't held at any hotel...It was at the RED BOX...haha....

Wei Yong and ME

This was me before the performance

My group members:Me,Wei Yong,Kar Yan,Yen Lum and Meng Choon had performed four dances yesterday.Overall the performance was just fantastic and well commented from the seniors.Others group performance were also flawless especially the third group sketch performance.Our seniors were also invited as well including the third year senior.One of my direct's direct senior was at there too and i was happy when she commented on my performance.Really happy after the course night because finally i cheorograph one dance for my group member and this is one of my success since i study in UNIVERSITY.

About the video,you all can go to my facebook profile to view it if u all would like to see.And overall for yesterday event,it was totally CRAZY and FREAK....all of us go to the stage and show the dance talents.Now i just know actually many of the course mate and seniors in CHEMISTRY DEPARTMENT can dance so well.....haha..looks like there still alot of improvement need to do.

Time to move on

Lets forget eveything

Start from the beginning

Lets just move on!!

10/11/11(secret feeling after so long)

I heard from my friends were mentioning that tomorrow is a lucky number date(11/11/11).Very very rare will happen in this kind of number.I was thinking doing something that are memorable,but it seems that quite impossible for me to do that,because is quite hard for me to do it again.Regret??yes,finally recently i start to think that i have a little bit regret of what i had done,is just that i not mature enough to handle this alone before.

This few days i've been asked by the same question:"Did u have any girl friend?"...At first i was very reluctant to answer this question because i don't wanna mention anything bout it.But when I think back,WHY NOT??!!so i just answered them with "YES"...But is too bad,i don't even know how to appreciate...I admit the changes of you did impress me a lot,even my friends were noticed on the changes.You may think you are still you,but you will never knew whether u had changed or not.

Whenever I touched back my past,I suddenly realized how immature actions i had done.Not only in what I had done,but even what I had spoken.I know you were hurt from my words before,but believe or not,it wasn't i tried to hurt u on purposely and i didn't mean it.Is not i want to get it back the relationship i just mentioned it out,all i wanna do is just to apologize what i had done on your memory.I know "sorry" is not enough to close up the wounds for this moment,but that's all i can do.Missing you,honestly yes and which couple who already broke up and does not miss the partner....But no matter how,i just can only keep in the other side of space of my heart.

So,i just hope that u will not live in the past,or rather i should say i should knew that u wouldn't live in the past.Right now all i wish on you is that u will always happy and will found another lovely partner than me,at least handsome than me(:P) and a bit responsible than me,who can always fetch you GO anywhere...haha...

YOU ARE THE REASON WHY I SMILE!!!AND REMEMBER,YOU ARE THE BEST JUST THE WAY YOU ARE.

3 days holidays

Yeah,3 days of holiday...So i just ccame back from UNI to my hometown on Friday.Who knows,what had happened yesterday??:(LOOK YOURSELF LAR!haha...)

Having my lunch yesterday at MCD 

Bought a few cloth from DP(70% discount at thr)

One of the sets of cloth

Taking photo with my sister..

Another sets of new cloth

Today,i also got another steamboat session with my family again.Later dinner will have another nice meal with my friends..At night,i will have another steamboat session as supper.Wah,wat a nice meal day i had today...hehe.....

No mood

Yesterday i wasn't able to update my blog is because yesterday i was busy...But this busy had make me very disappointed.I was busy with my course night dance.I had arrange few easy dances for my group members but in the end,they just give me one reply:"can change to other's dance mar??"Just imagine,i hardly cheorographed a simple dance for them and they don't even have any intention to dance...WTH man!!!waste my time to do the cheorography.

One thing that make me feel very very uncomfortable with one of my group member is she keep deny everything from head to toes of my suggestion.But when asked her to give some ideas,she just say:"you give lar,just change to other dance.."Wat the F**k man,go to hell and find ur husband in the hell...then can ask him to teach you dance lar....anything also cannot,curse you DAMN IT!!!

At least yesterday found some friends that having the same problems.We had a nice chat though the time we ended our conversation was quite late,but is worth for it.Now i just know how to handle such "no corporation among the member" case through the conversation.

Argh!!I felt like very very angry yesterday but there's nothing i can do about it.Like what one of my friends said:"just let it be,when the time they should get tension,they will just get tension by themselves." which is very true about it.But later still have to go and meet them,dunno whether i got that mood to continue teach them dance moves.Haiz...

But when i suddenly heard from my food tech friends that they wanna come to Melaka for Haji vacation,i was like:"Yeah,finally i got chance to go and have fun in holiday!!".I will try my best to be the best food guides although i quite seldom go out when i was in Melaka,but hey,i quite known of many foods in Melaka that is famous for.

Looking forward for the Haji holiday come...haha

Don't want to close my eyes,cause I'd miss you babe

Suddenly reminded by this song.....

I was totally be holded by the lyrics:

I could stay awake just to hear you breathing

Watch you smile while you are sleeping

While you're far away and dreaming

I could spend my life in this sweet surrender

I could stay lost in this moment forever

Where every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure

Don't want to close my eyes

I don't want to fall asleep

Cause I'd miss you babe

And I don't want to miss a thing

Cause even when I dream of you

The sweetest dream will never do

I'd still miss you babe

And I don't want to miss a thing

Lying close to you feeling your heart beating

And I'm wondering what you're dreaming

Wondering if it's me you're seeing

Then I kiss your eyes

And thank God we're together

I just want to stay with you in this moment forever

Forever and ever

I don't want to close my eyes

I don't want to fall asleep

Cause I'd miss you babe

And I don't want to miss a thing

Cause even when I dream of you

The sweetest dream will never do

I'd still miss you babe

And I don't want to miss a thing

I don't want to miss one smile

I don't want to miss one kiss

I just want to be with you

Right here with you, just like this

I just want to hold you close

Feel your heart so close to mine

And just stay here in this moment

For all the rest of time Yeah yeah yeah

I don't want to close my eyes

I don't want to fall asleep

Cause I'd miss you babe

And I don't want to miss a thing

Cause even when I dream of you

The sweetest dream will never do

I'd still miss you babe

And I don't want to miss a thing

I Don't want to close my eyes

I don't want to fall asleep

Cause I'd miss you babe

And I don't want to miss a thing

Cause even when I dream of you

The sweetest dream will never do

I'd still miss you babe

And I don't want to miss a thing

Don't want to close my eyes

I don't want to fall asleep

And I don't want to miss a thing

Back to Uni

Today suppose woke up at 9.30a.m,but you know,sometimes boys might be a little~~~~~bit lazy...so i just kept my body laid down till 10.30a.m...Suddenly heard a person screamed:"What time already still want to sleep?!!!"..I quickly just jumped off from my bed and go to prepare everything...after prepared everything nicely nicely,i just took a ride from my senior's car and back to my UNI at 2.00p.m...So i reached my hostel is about 3.45p.m...

Summary of my holiday week:

HECTIC YET MY STOMACH ALWAYS FULL!!!HAHA...

I just keep eating only since i arrived my hometown last Saturday until the moment i want to leave my hometown,i still eating too...haha....Anyway,thanks to my mummy,i have this fortune to eat many food all the while i was in my hometown last week.And mostly are prepared by my mum o...haha...

Sick and ill

Refer to the above title,u all should know that I FALL SICK...sore throat and flu.So unfortunte that i get caught in sick and i don't want to be sick coz i don't like to get sick(dunno wat i'm talking about?just ignore it ba)

A friend of mine( SF. Cheng) suggest me to eat apple and orange...But since i was a kid,i use to get sick once i ate oranges.But anyway,my friend said that this time won't get sick after i eat,so i decided to try out later...

This week many of my uni mates having a hard time,not say all but some...because this week will be the result week for the last small test.Even i also did not satisfied with my result,coz i just use up three hours to do the revision.And thanks to HER again,her book rescued me once as i just refer to her book in this three hours.If not my result should be worst than this.

Thinking of going back tommorow to my uni,i feel very uneasy because a lot of things are rushing toward me to be completed.But i still in holiday mood anyway..Very fast already wanna reach November...soon enough will have the Christmas and Chinese New Year.So i am looking forward for the coming holidays...haha....

Random

After a LONG LONG LONG.......well,just ignore that grandmother story of why not updating my blog...And i guess not much people following my blog,so i think that was the reason why i'm not updating my blog frequently??hehe...Don't look at me,i don't even know the reason...haha...

As you can see from the previous post,i had change back my style of writing...."GRANDMOTHER STORY TELLING STYLE"haha....the reason is because i have a lot of things wanna spit out...

I stayed at UPM for almost up to five weeks and including this mid sem break week is the 6th week of my UNI week.Many things had happen and change my perspective in different ways of viewing certain things.For example,my biology lecturer had change the point of view of learning the biology that had set in my mind long time ago.I should thank him as now i know what is the true meaning of learning something,although i still don't get the gist of learning the biology...:p..The other thing was i remembered something that had change the history of my life that i couldn't reach back the way we are used to be anymore,so i just though positively and just say in my mind:"Lets just move on!"

Interestingly,i also get known of one new friend.She is quite charming,pretty and kinda sweet in looking.I know,u must thinking that i was in relationship right??the answer is no...haha..sorry for disappointing you...Is my pleasure to know her as friend(dunno whether in future got any relationship with her although i wanna it so badly ><)....she studying food technology course and this sem she having one of the same subject with me...but it seems that she is quite comfortable with her studies except one killing subject for every girl~~PHYSICS...don't you agree as well??Anyway,since i also quite free after my revision and she asked my help,so i just show her my "dirty tricks" in physics...well,is not show off,just an offer for help...haha...But anyway,i also need to pick up for my BIOLOGY and TITAS as memorizing facts technique is my weakness....

I LIKE YOU JUST THE WAY YOU ARE....muacks...haha..Time to go..bye..

New life in UNI

Finally,

after one week time,

i survive for ONE WEEK TIME in UPM...

Is kinda same as PLKN life,

but it is much better than PLKN...

Just back from UPM and i get a news from my schoolmates...

NO WATER FOR FEW DAYS!!!

OMG,how am i gonna survive without water??!!!

ANYWAY,

i still manage to have a bath tonite...

hehe..

that's all for today...

gotta sleep now..

Johor Trip(30/08~01/09)~~~LoVE iT!!!!!

Finally reached home from my Johor Trip

haha!!!

It was a nice trip,

although we did not went to DESARU(as promised by my aunt),

coz suddenly my aunt's husband got work...

However,

we had go shopping...

Yea Yea,

and bought a new bag too...

very nice bag and look a bit fancy...

Erm,

throughout whole trip,

we just do only one thing in common...

THAT IS~~

EAT!EAT!EAT!

We kept eat only once we reached my aunt house...

Haha..until the day we want to leave Johor also still eating...hehe...

Is a nice trip afterall

although is just three days...

Edited Picture

Waiting boring in the coffee shop

Baked breads...Yummy!!!

All of us got new bags...hehe

From left: My sister,My niece(Wan Jing),My newphew(Jian Feng) and Me

Thanks to my aunt and her family who guided us during this trip...haha...

Ghost month

Ghost month...

I heard many of weird cases from my relatives and friends..

But strange is,

I NEVER HAD IT BEFORE EVEN ONCE...

of course,

i dun wish i have it too...

Anyway,

just be careful all the time...

HEHE....

Badminton

Today watched the final

between LCW and LD...

First set,

the luck goes to LCW

he plays safe in many rally

Second and third sets,

LD has his day...

Final result is

LD won the gold medal...

What i want to say is,

LCW does not lose...

because he fought with his own will and strength...

he never let his guard down...

just keep defense and try to smash in whatever chance...

LCW,

I WILL SUPPORT YOU FOREVER....

Pig+Penang Laksa

Today,

I'm a PIG for whole day.

Look at my time schedule for today's activities:

3.00A.M 11/08/2011~11.30A.M 12/08/2011---Sleep

12.00P.M 12/08/2011~1.00P.M 12/08/2011--Eat lunch+Fetch my sis back

1.15P.M 12/08/2011~5.15P.M 12/08/2011--Sleep

5.15P.M 12/08/2011~6.30P.M 12/08/2011--Watch MUSIC BANK

7.00P.M  12/08/2011~8.00P.M 12/08/2011--Eat dinner at Pasar Malam

UNTIL NOW:

PC+ing

Today,my dinner was PENANG LAKSA

first time ate Penang Laksa....

quite appetizing and tasty...

3 stars out of 5 stars will be given....

hehe

Outing Day

今天和我一位算是很要好的朋友看戏。

今天看的戏名叫RISE OF THE PLANET OF APES。

的确是很好看，但是呢我的朋友看到遮脸。

她说有点恐怖，我倒是觉得蛮精彩的。

两个小时的戏，就在pahlawan GSC 看完。

看完以后，我们就去吃东西。

没想到她吃比我还多。

哈哈，不愧是"吃"王。

一面吃一面聊点心事，我听她讲她的故事，她也听我讲我的故事，聊得蛮起劲的。

吃饱后，我们俩就去走走消化，因为我们是饱到讲不出话来。

她说要看看手表，就去手表摊望一望，但她找不到她喜欢的。

走了一阵子，我们便走去car park的地方。

正要到那儿的时候，竟然看到不应该看到的人（呵呵，人就让他保持神秘吧）。

总而言之，今天出去是已经几年的从逢，也谢谢她肯载我出去(她可是才拿到车license的哦），真的是很愉快的一天。

希望还能和她出去多几次，培养友情。

Vacation

Yesterday and today,i saw many photos were posted on the facebook.Looks like my precious school class trip was a success and everyone seems very enjoy and of course tired as well after the trip. Looking at the photos they've posted, i say there is a strong bonds and chemistry that cannot seperate all of these friends.Although is not that many taking part in this trip,but surely is a memorable trip to them.

But as for me, i have a lot of things need to do in this last month. I've settle all the Uni document except the last thing~~the course fees which is the most troublesome part for me.Haha...no doubt my holidays seem a bit dull for some people,but when it comes to me,it will never been dull for each day.These holidays i learn a lot of new things and the way the being a good person.For some people,you may not understand what i'm talking about.But soon enough you will understand when u starting to have your own family.

So as for now,i finally realized what is meant by "FAMILY" is the most precious gift from the god.

New phone

yesterday just bought a new phone

and 

GUESS WHAT IS THE MODEL OF THE PHONE?!!

Hints:It is almost alike with i-phone physically..

Haha...

Is SAMSUNG GALAXY ACE!!!!

And i like it very much....

just done personalise my phone today

Many songs and videos were kept inside

I LIKE MY PHONE VERY MUCH!!!!!!