random

Today,i have a very strong missing feeling to her.And i don't know why.Guess this is how should it be when something call "different".

I read her blog today.I just realized something after she mentioned it.I knew,I am not comfort enough,not even close to have a comparison with him.He is good,better than me in studies,and even friendly than me.He knows when she sad,sick and even take a good care of her.She told me what if one day she was touched by his mighty care and concern and accept him,i just replied her one statement,i maybe not know whether she will or not,all i know is i just want to do my best to care for her.If one day she accept him,that's mean i had done my best and yet is not better than him,and i will not regret on anything.I know i had done many stupid things and make u feel that i am not that good.sometimes i also hate myself.

There's a statement from my friend:''If you love someone,not neccessary you need to have her in person,as long her heart is always a space for your love,is already enough for the person who love her."This is very true coz this already happen on me.Not even realized,i had fall in love on her.I did not tell her about this matter coz I don't know whether she even have a like on me.So I just keep it inside my heart,and because of that statement,i believe that for what i had done,is always a good thing for her and absolutely not to harm her.I don't want to repeat my mistake and force her.This time i want to learn how to respect other's people decision even though the final result is a NO.I know maybe i really not even can be in the comparison with him,and i know she should deserve the best,but i already did my best as all i could.Depends on her how she felt about her choice and feel,and all i can do is wait.